


LaFontaine and Rick the Floating Skull

by doshegotthebooty



Series: Rick The Floating Skull [2]
Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: Gen, Rick the Floating Skull - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-19
Updated: 2015-02-19
Packaged: 2018-03-13 20:40:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3395606
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doshegotthebooty/pseuds/doshegotthebooty
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>LaFontaine was having a normal day until Rick wants to make a contract.</p>
            </blockquote>





	LaFontaine and Rick the Floating Skull

LaFontaine is comparing yeast cultures when a floating and flaming human skull appears in the back right corner of their room.

 

“HELLO, SUSAN LAFONTAINE, WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE A CONTRACT?”

 

“Dude, it’s just LaFontaine.”

 

“OH, EXCUSE ME, LAFONTAINE, WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE A CONTRACT?”

 

“Um, I’m kinda busy right now. Plus you kinda popped outta nowhere, unannounced. What if I was doing something private?

 

What if I was naked? What would you have done?”

 

“I DO NOT CARE FOR SUCH THINGS, LAFONTAINE. I CARE ONLY TO MAKE CONTRACTS, LAFONTAINE.”

 

“Okay, but what is the contract for? Like what would I get? What would I give up?”

 

“YOU MAY HAVE ANYTHING YOU DESIRE, LAFONTAINE. HOWEVER, IT WILL COME AT A PRICE.”

 

“Okay, like anything? Like what if I want to destroy the world, kill everyone. Could I do that? This seems pretty overpowered, dude.”

 

“YOU CANNOT DESTROY ME, NOR CARMILLA KARNSTEIN. THAT IS THE ONLY LIMITATION, LAFONTAINE.”

 

“So, can I wish for more wishes?”

 

“YES, BUT THE WISHES WILL ALSO COME AT A PRICE, LAFONTAINE.”

 

“So it’s more economical to make one, got it. Okay, so like, could I make someone fall in love with me?”

 

“OF COURSE, LAFONTAINE.”

 

“Can I kill someone?”

 

“YES, BUT YOU CANNOT DESTROY ME, NOR,”

 

“Nor Carmilla Karnstein, yeah, okay. Alright, do I have to make the wish now, or do I have time to think it over?”

 

“YOU HAVE UNTIL MIDNIGHT, LAFONTAINE.”

 

“Of course it’s midnight, okay. I’ll be back, man.”

 

“I AM NO MORTAL, MY NAME IS RICK, LAFONTAINE.”

 

“I’ll see you in a bit, Rick.”

 

 

* * *

Lafontaine knocks on Perry’s door, because unlike certain flaming skulls, they have a sense of common courtesy. Perry swings the door open

 

and has a giant smile on her face. She pulls Lafontaine in and quickly closes the door.

 

“Sus- LaFontaine, you’ll never guess what just happened! A girl came in who needed help with her menstrual cycle! It was wonderful!”

 

“Perr, that’s great, but um, I’m having a situation of my own right now.”

 

“What can your official floor don do for you today, hon?” Perry waggles her eyebrows in an adorable yet slightly off-putting way.

 

“It’s not what we usually work on together, Perry.”

 

“Oh, then what is it, LaF?”

 

“Okay, this won’t be normal, and I know how you like your normal, but there’s kind of a floating flaming skull in my dorm room right now.”

 

Perry smiles and shuffles LaF out the door, saying that there’s an official floor don meeting in five minutes.

 

 

 

* * *

LaFontaine walks into Laura and Carmilla’s dorm and sees something unholy.

 

“GOD DAMMIT PUT CLOTHES ON FOR FIVE SECONDS, WOULD YA?”

 

“Maybe, if you imbeciles would knock for once, you wouldn’t see this.” Carmilla growls and throws a blanket on herself and Laura.

 

“What do you want? I’m busy.”

 

“What’s with Rick?”

 

Laura butts in, “God, LaFontaine, can’t this wait? You have until midnight.”

 

“You both knew? Then no, this can’t wait. What’s with Rick?”

 

Carmilla and Laura roll their eyes. “LaFontaine,” Laura sighs, “We are currently very busy. Whatever Rick tells you is what we would

 

tell you, so please leave us alone.”

 

“If I sell my soul because you two assholes were too busy doing this,” They wave their hands around in that general direction, “I will

 

personally mail you both flaming bags of dog crap.”

 

LaFontaine is leaving the room and hears “Don’t come back.” and Carmilla being scolded.

 

 

* * *

“WELCOME BACK LAFONTAINE, WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE A CONTRACT?”

 

“Might as well, Rick. Do you have any specials?”

 

“I DO NOT UNDERSTAND, LAFONTAINE. WOULD YOU LIKE TO MAKE A CONTRACT?”

 

“Chill, Rick, it was a joke. But yeah, I want to make a contract.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, let me know what you think!


End file.
